Wednesday, January 7, 2015

I love you Later. Go away, Now. -

The idea of "Later" is alluring. The reality is practically debilitating.

I love "Later."  In the way I would love something bad for me.  Doughnuts, are my first thought. It feels right at the moment and it doesn't really give back.

"Oh, I am shooting obscene amounts of hormones in to my body with a needle. I'm starving!! I'll eat whatever I want and figure that out later.  Do we have any pie?" (Cut to: a chubby body).

"I'm super busy this morning - I will exercise later today." (Cut to: a chubby body).

"I'm too tired to unload the dishwasher right now. I'll empty and reload later and just put my dishes in the sink for now." (Cut to: a messy house).
I have no idea what this means, Ergodic?
Is that a cinnamon roll I should know about it?
This chart feels just as awful as Later feels.

I have 16,000 of these.

Just buying time. It feels right.

Later's mean sidekick is "There is plenty of time for that." Beware - that one is a real jerk. 

Later's arch enemy is Now.  

I love you, Later.
Go away, Now.

As some of you know I have gained weight. I have been whining about it for over a year. I blame the idea of "Later." And hormones. And the existence of hot dogs and doughnuts. 

Later is such an exquisite place for Tired Girls though.  And sometimes it really works. Sometimes Later I feel awesome, ready, strong, inspired, motivated, rich. 


Well shit. 
But damnit, Now is here. And has presented itself with clothes that don't fit and a body that feels like it doesn't belong to me.  And a different self esteem. Gag. Fuck you Later. 






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