Wednesday, May 31, 2017

May's Most Favorites

In January I was going to start writing a monthly favorite-things post. But in true Tired Girl style it took awhile longer, though I eventually got to it. So yay for following through - who cares about a timeline.

Tired Girl's Most Favorite Things in May 

1. These Target Mossimo Supply Co crewneck tees - if I am not wearing one then they are probably all in the wash and I don't have a shirt on. This is seriously close to all I wear -- and I have like six of the grey ones. Their grey. Not black, not white. Grey.
Here's 27 million photos of me in one of these t-shirts. I take selfies only occasionally to document something or other on my face or hair, and no one takes pics of me with my own phone, so I didn't have a lot of options. But I wear these shirts like everyday so I found a few.
Even though I am accosting Teddy in one of these photos, he is laying on me in another one - so it's proof he really does love me and I don't just annoy him. 

2. This inexpensive nail polish - Sinful Colors -  in Hazard. I can not definitively say it's the best quality - I can't say that it isn't - I just don't know. But I love this color. Sinful Colors in Hazard
These are not my hands. I am not a hand model. I rarely paint my nubby fingernails and my toes make an appearance here and there, but they weren't feeling it today. This color makes everything look fun and summery.  
Image result for sinful colors hazard


Though these aren't my fingers I would obviously cling to this bottle in the same way. Sinful Colors "Hazard 952." Incidentally this color looks amazeballs with the grey shirts I wear everyday

3. Teddy. Similar sweet nuggets are available at your local rescue/shelter. 
Side eye. 

4. My new Ikea Hemnes (in black/brown) dresser in my office.  This is not a photo of my dresser or office. I don't have cute pics of my new dresser to post yet, but this pic was my inspiration piece; it's from Land of Nod. So really this Land of Nod room is my fave thing right now. I am not even close to exaggerating when I say that I want almost every single dresser that Land of Nods has to offer for "kids" room. 


5. The Coldplay and Chainsmokers song - Something Just Like This

My alliance falls more on the side of Coldplay than The Chainsmokers. I wasn't forced to choose - no one demanded to know The Tired Girl's musical review. I just felt like pre-emptively distancing myself from The Chainsmokers. 

6. Pesto!!!  The recipe I came up with I named: "I know the general ingredients and I'm too tired to wash measuring spoons, so I just threw stuff in!"
- Handful of fresh basil leaves
- Handful of walnuts (I didn't have any pine nuts)
- Smaller handful of shaved parmesan
- Some garlic powder (As a Tired Girl I don't love the cleanup of fresh garlic. You can send your complaints about garlic powder and criticisms to
- Some olive oil
- Some kosher sea salt
- Squeeze of lemon juice
- Little bit of pepper
I squished it all up in my food processor (yes I got the FP out for this one - that's how obsessed I am with pesto).
Then smeared it on almost everything for about a week. My most fave concoction was artisan bread, fresh mozzarella slices, ugly tomato slices and pesto made in to a sandwich and pressed in my panini maker. I ate this for like 13 meals this month and gained two pounds back. I didn't really have boundaries with this one.

This is not my recipe or my food processor.  But I felt the need to provide an actual recipe. I have not tried this one but this bloggers recipe was chosen by me because I liked her photos best. See "Simply Recipes" pesto recipe here. 
Anyone have something appropriate they would like to share that they are obsessed with this month?

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Self-Diagnosing an Eating Disorder

I had a friend in college that had a straight up eating disorder.  It wasn't about the food - it was about control. 

I remember naively thinking with envy that I would never have an eating disorder, because I got too hungry. Control was less important than pizza and gin and tonics and donuts. It was horrible that I was actually sort of a little bit jealous. Shows the fucked up attitudes women have about being skinny. And sadly I may potentially make some bad choices today, if it could get me back to that college weight. 
A classic.

Anywhoo I recently diagnosed myself with something I would call "a reason I eat the way I do." I can't say it's a disorder. I'm not trying to shirk responsibility, but also not trying to make this out to something bigger (like my toosh - woot woot!).  

But as you may know I have gained weight and have been working hard to lose the weight. 

I was recently reading a very boring and a teeny bit helpful diet book (here) - and I'll paraphrase the quote that got to me. It was about the idea that those of us that like to eat have an inner saboteur. 

An inner voice that sabotages us. 

What does this saboteur say to you, when is it the loudest, etc? The author told me to take some time to listen to that inner voice. 

My first thought was "Pffft I don't have that. I just like the way hamburgers taste. I don't have a weird relationship with food. I'm normal, just hungry." 

And then pop - like a cartoon - I had a thought bubble right over my head that read:

 "Life is hard and I deserve to treat myself to something that tastes good. I deserve it."  

And it was crystal clear. I did have an inner saboteur and it was the idea: "I feel like crap because (fill in the blank with shitty life things) and I want to eat something yummy - I deserve a treat for what I am going through." 
Not kidding.

And that was it. I found my inner saboteur.  So now I am working on treating myself to things that are not fattening food.  I was considering buying things, but that just replaces one problem with another.  (Private note just to Joe: Don't worry).  What's too bad is I don't want stuff - it feels weird to reward myself with things! But feels right to push a cinnamon roll in my mouth. 

I am down 12 pounds which is whole size. I'm at the point in weight loss where I can put my jeans in the drier.  So hell yeah. This was prior to understanding my inner saboteur. That jerk. So just watch out now. I have a little bit more to go and then add in the idea of taking my slightly smaller body and creating muscles. So the journey continues, but I am so proud of myself I feel like I deserve a treat. 

Any Tired Girls out there want to share what their inner-saboteur says to you? Or any personal journey successes? 

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